This Is Not A Joke

We repeat, the following article is not a joke.

The Dallas Stars will be signing Mike Modano to a one-day contract worth $999,999 so that he can retire as a Dallas Star.

This will be happening tomorrow at his press conference. This is by far the strangest yet greatest thing that has happened in this young season.

As Shanny said in the email, 'This is how it should be.'


Other news:

- The New York Islanders named Mark Streit as the captain. AWESOME!!! We are beyond excited about this. He is the first Swiss-born player named a captain.


- If you're looking for some fantasy hockey advice, NHL.com has who they think will be the sleepers this season.


- The Flyers signed Sean Couturier to an entry-level contract. Wooooo.


- Not to be outdone, the Blue Jackets re-signed RJ Umberger to a five-year contract extension.


- Dustin Byfuglien has been charged with four counts of driving while under the influence. He is our hero and that is why we're bad people.


- Realignment of the teams was the biggest discussion at the Board of Governor's meetings. Rumors abound that Nashville will be in the SE and Winnipeg will take it's place in the Central. Interesting....


- Kurtis Foster could be missing the start of the season due to another surgery to his thigh to remove a wire from the Torrey Mitchell hit of 2008.